{"id":2571,"date":"2015-09-08T11:52:00","date_gmt":"2015-09-08T15:52:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/?p=2571"},"modified":"2016-12-21T14:24:37","modified_gmt":"2016-12-21T19:24:37","slug":"10-funniest-things-patients-have-said-to-nurses-doctors","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/10-funniest-things-patients-have-said-to-nurses-doctors","title":{"rendered":"10 Funniest Things Patients Have Said to Nurses & Doctors"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n
\n \n
\n \n
\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n \n
\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n
\n \n\n
<\/div>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n<\/div>\n \n\n
\n 5\/5 - (1 vote) <\/div>\n <\/div>\n

When you’ve been a nurse for a while, believe me, that element of surprise you initially had becomes nonexistent. In fact, nothing shocks us after a certain point. We’ve seen enough silliness, grossness, and just plain “what the heck” moments that nothing phases us. However, it’s always a great time to poke fun at some of the things we’ve seen (and heard) in the workplace. Here are some real-life nurse and physician accounts of the weirdest and most hysterical things they’ve heard from their patients.<\/p>\n

I headed to Reddit to find some of the internet’s most hilarious things real patients have said to doctors.<\/p>\n

10 Funniest Things Patients Have Said to Nurses & Doctors<\/h3>\n

1.<\/strong> I had an alcoholic patient who kept asking for a six pack but the funny part is that she was so aggravated\/annoyed with people coming in her room, she said verbatim “I wish I had Ebola so you people would leave me alone.”<\/em><\/strong> (submitted by tjh28 RN, BSN- Stepdown)<\/p>\n

2. Had a patient wake up from anesthesia. first thing he said was, “I WANT A KLONDIKE BAR!<\/em>“<\/strong> and said it with a real aggressive tone, like he was pissed we didn’t have it ready for him. (submitted by mynameismaryjo MSN, CRNA)<\/p>\n

3.<\/strong> [A patient] held my hand, looked at my aid, and said, “This is my lover. This is what I get.<\/em>“<\/strong> (submitted by tansrn RN, BSN)<\/p>\n

4.<\/strong> As I was contemplating eating a donut and staring at it, one of my confused, demented patients is sitting in a wheelchair behind me at the station, sees me and tells me out of the blue “you eat that donut and I’ll watch your figure for you.<\/em>“<\/strong> I never laughed so hard. I told his wife later and she couldn’t believe it. (submitted by amesann RN-trauma)<\/p>\n

5.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Patient: Excuse me<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Me: Why?<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Patient: * mouths * I farted<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

(submitted by DoctorBrynncess RN, BN- Palliative)<\/p>\n

6.<\/strong>\u00a0 Friends dad said a lady came in complaining about the “sick as hell” disease.<\/em><\/strong> She had sickle cell. (submitted by GrantzRantz)<\/p>\n

7.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n
\n

Had a patient try to explain her husband’s seizure meds to me:<\/p>\n

“He’s on them peanut butter balls.”<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

“Peanut butter balls?” I think for a moment, “peanut butter balls, peanut butter ba<\/em>– Oh man, do you mean phenobarbital?!?”<\/p>\n

“Yes, that’s what I just said!”<\/p>\n

(submitted by Liv-Julia)<\/p>\n

8.<\/strong> (I’m a [female] nurse) I was bending over an elderly patient to help him and he looks right at me (our faces are very close) and with great concern says “You look like Hitler”<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

\n
\n

I knew then I let my lip fuzz get too out of control… (submitted by ladyprime)<\/p>\n

9.<\/strong> We had a lady a while back with abdominal pain. When asked to describe the pain she said “It feels like I’m Wonder Woman shooting flames out of my nipples.”<\/strong><\/em> (submitted bt Dahl0314)<\/p>\n

10.<\/strong> Had a lady call 911 for her newborn because, “His meats is falling out!”<\/em><\/strong> She was hysterically sobbing and screaming. The “meat” was her baby’s umbilical cord stump falling off like normal. (submitted by katherine_rf)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

When you’ve been a nurse for a while, believe me, that element of surprise you initially had becomes nonexistent. In fact, nothing shocks us after a certain point. We’ve seen enough silliness, grossness, and just plain “what the heck” moments that nothing phases us. However, it’s always a great time to poke fun at some […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2581,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[343],"tags":[354,172,188,355],"class_list":["post-2571","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nurse","tag-funny","tag-nurse","tag-patient","tag-physicians"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2571","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2571"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2571\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3584,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2571\/revisions\/3584"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2581"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2571"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2571"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.travelnursesource.com\/notes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2571"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}