5 Patients You Can Expect This Summer

You’re probably saying to yourself, “finally, some warm weather and sunshine.” Sadly, an increase in temperature will also mean an increase in injuries this summer. Suddenly, summer, the sunshine and swimming will be replaced with stings, scrapes, and, of course, sunburn. These cast of characters below will surely make an appearance at some point this summer, so we’ve chosen a few as a forewarning of some unique visitors.

The Lobster – This unsightly creature, male or female, will most likely creep into the office very gingerly. As a result of falling asleep in the sun for far too long, they will most likely be a shade of red that falls between Maryland Crab Chowder and Clifford the Big Red Dog. Also be on the lookout for hand imprints across their stomach or the paperback romance outline. We know this big red monster might be hard to deal with, but remember that sunburn can be very serious, and lead to sun poisoning and even skin cancer.

The Showoff – We all know this person. He’s most likely the Uncle that your parents whisper in hushed voices about. He shows up to the family reunions talking about his highlights as a high school quarterback…30 years ago. This lovely character will probably have one too many before deciding to show off his Olympic caliber diving skills on your neighbor’s swimming pool. One slip off the end will have him joining the 5,000 plus swimming pool injuries per year. He’ll arrive in your office wet and worse for wear.

The Scab – Isn’t that what children are anyway? One big scab that spreads colds, eats food and makes a lot of noise. Any parent knows that a child is going to get some bumps and bruises, and the increased temperature and nice weather will only increase the frequency of these mishaps. Scraped knees, bumped chins, bruised shins, split lips only scratch the surface of what your child could end up with. Expect a small army of these little daredevils to make their way into your office.

The Pincushion – If only our curious minds could just keep us safe. Sadly, you will most likely encounter a character whose curiosity got the best of them. They most likely encountered a beehive near the back shed and they’ve decided to use the same DIY attitude that got half of the guest room painted. Instead of leaving it to the professionals, this character most likely went in guns blazing, armed with a can of raid, a rake, and belly full of confidence. After his or her defeat, they will be in much need of your care, so be gentle when plucking out those stingers.

The Stubborn Grandpa – Grandparents are stubborn. It’s a fact just like death and taxes. They still believe they’re in their prime and they still believe they can do the same amount of work as they used to. Retirement has left them no other choice than to spend it watching The Young and the Restless or outside in the yard. Unfortunately, the rising temperature and humidity make them a perfect candidate for heat stroke or heat exhaustion. Hopefully, their children and grandchildren haven’t strayed too far from the nest and are able to help out, but Grandpa’s are still known to be quite stubborn. Against his wishes, his wife will most likely bring him in after an especially tough day outside, so be on the lookout for Grandpa.

Author: Troy Diffenderfer

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